Ditto

Starting last week, before my husband went to school, or before i took Amy into her room for her sleep, he would say "i love you" to Amy. Since "love you, too" is too hard for Amy, i told her to say "ditto".
Today, before her daddy left, he said, "i love you". i was feeding amy at the moment.So I didn't really pay attention to that. Out of nowhere, Amy suddenly yelled, "Ditto~". It melt my heart at that very moment. I almost cried. :pMy husband said more than three times "I love you", amy all responded correctly, and with the sweetest smile.
Later i tried. It appears that it only works for her daddy. :(

赖

很多中文词汇我都对应不上英文啊。。。比如说赖，委屈。。。

自从amy有过night terror以后，我开始重新考虑对她的教育问题。女孩子敏感，虽然她还小，也懂不少了，阿姨一句话，就震动得她的小心灵颤好几天。挺乖一孩子，我为什么还要对她凶？从此，叛变严母的队伍，走向温和一派。

她是何等样的敏锐啊。妈妈策略有变，自然对策就要变。最近几天，一天赖似一天。
某天早上，她自己坐在小椅子里喝奶，安详宁静，略带洋洋得意，一张胖脸嘟着，两只黑手捧着杯子，认真得不得了。遥想当年她缩在我怀里咕嘟咕嘟吃奶，吃完了累喉喉儿的喘气，感触良多啊，就跟她说，要不要坐到妈妈怀里来喝奶？小人儿本来高高兴兴，听了此话，一下子瘪起嘴来，委委屈屈的假哭，嚎叫“怀～～里～～”，“怀～～里～～”，好像我刚才是怎么虐待她了一样。

Slide

Amy finally figured out how to play the slide all by herself. We started to take her to play almost 1 year ago. Either her daddy or me would let her sit in our lap and then slide down. She absolutely loves it. As she get bigger, she got more intrested in the stairs. She'd hold our hands and clime up the stairs then follow the stairs back down. Every time i took her to the slide side, she'd shake her head or say no. Some time she'd let me hold her hand and then drag her down the slide slowly. She is really concerned about safety! Definitely got that from her daddy. Not me.

And the last sunday she suddenly figured out the whole process. She'd climb up the stairs by herself, refusing me touch her anywhere. And then she'd sit down far far far far away from the slide, slowly scouting to the slide. Of course she'd hesitate a little bit. She has a safety-geek daddy after all. Eventually she'd slowly slide down, with a proud smile on her face. The cutest part is that after she got down to the floor, she'd run back to the stair, in the mean time yelling, hurry! hurry! hurry!

I taped her playing slide and then played it on the computer. Amy got even more exciting when she watched it. She'd wait till the amy in the screen slide down and then yell, yay~~~~~~

Anticipation

On our way to day care, there is a new bank branch opening at one of the street corner. They put a lot of ballon around that corner to attract attentions. Amy noticed that the first day they were placed, even before me noticed the construction is done. She pointed at the ballons and yelled "ball! ball! ball!". For the past couple of days, she'd do that everytime we passed the corner. However, the wind has been pretty strong recently. Some of the ballons flew away, the other lost all the air. Today there's nothing left. Even before we get to that corner, out of habit and anticipation, amy yelled excitedly, ball! ball! ball! Then she looked out, nothing there. That's when she turned to me, all confused, saying, ah-oh! ah-oh! I guess changes, even teeny tiny ones, irrelevant ones, are confusing to them.

fast learner

最近发现amy每天都在偷偷摸摸的学很多东西，我怀疑她是有小本本藏着，记了笔记的。

1. 某日我和老公闲聊，说，我妈如何如何，第一个如何还没说出来，小人儿就在旁边接下茬：袜袜！袜袜！（袜袜＝姥姥）至今我也不知道她怎么FIGURE OUT的人际关系。

2.春暖花开时节，母女二人驾车出行。我间或的指一下，AMY，看，花～第二天，AMY便自己指一棵梨树，花～，然后推广到看树就指，花～花～花～花～我赶紧纠正，不对，白的粉的是花，绿的是树。第三天，一路上，看AMY伸着小黑手，花！白白～树！白白～树！白白～忙了一阵，突然，BALL!白白～我一看，可不，谁家门口飘着气球两个。

3.幼儿园新来小朋友两个，noah和spence，轮流大哭每天。amy以前是深情的叫小朋友的名字然后微笑。前天放学路上，挨个念叨，avory,呵呵，lucia,呵呵，davin，呵呵，然后突然语气一变，带着哭腔大叫，noah~55555, spence~5555555。

4.某日睡前准备沐浴后要更的衣，在amy壁橱里找许久也找不到bodysuit，我就和自己嘀咕，说，哦，在洗衣间吧，脚下正在东摸西摸的小人儿听罢拔腿就跑，跑到洗衣间门口，指着门大叫：门！门！门！我自己都是第一次管那个房间叫洗衣间。可以算小人儿和我心意相通？

5.小人书架上画书一百本，其中混杂lucky杂志一本，目前是她favorite。翻开书页，找到亚裔或者墨裔美女就深情呼唤，姨～姨～。杂志封面美女的照片在目录那页也会出现，每看到目录，她就指着那个微缩了的照片认为是书中书，说，书～BOOK~担心妈妈不懂中文，英文也要说出来。

6.姥姥姥爷回国了，仍然想念。每次回家，一下高速公路，觉得快到家了，立刻叫，袜袜～爷爷～等红灯时，旁边一辆车，车里挂着一串骰子，姥爷从LAS VEGAS带回来常和AMY玩儿的，便指着说，爷爷～我便常常带她打电话给北京，渐渐的，已经接受了姥姥姥爷住在电话里的事实。某日我去接她，自己坐在小椅子上，静悄悄的举着一个玩具电话，在说，袜袜～爷爷～北京～家家～要是她姥姥看到，要哭鼻子了估计。

Sleep problems

Starting this winter, amy's been giving me a huge headache during her sleep time. Now every time i put her to bed, i'd be in this terrified stage, worrying what will happen during the night... It all started when she got sick. Every time she caught something, it'll start by her waking up nad refusing to go back to sleep around midnight. That's why i am so mortified each time she woke up. My instinct would tell me she's sick again. Unfortunately my instinct hasn't failed me so far. :(

Last week, she even had an episode of night terror. It was triggered by her biting. Amy's actually not very offensive, never started a fight. But if somebody tries to get her stuff, she's a fighter, a good one. Sean happens to be a guy who has a habbit to grab others' toy. So Amy has bited Sean at least twice. I guess the teachers gave her a hard time. I never gave amy time-out at home, i just can't. When teacher gave her time out, it struck her really hard. Last thursday night, the whole night, she kept talking in her dream, NO MINE! NO MINE! Even when i hold her, she couldn't calm down, and she even tried to walk away from me with her eyes closed. It totally broke my heart. I ended up sleeping with her that night.

Yesterday, similar thing happened. She didn't really have night terror. But she just couldn't go back to sleep. i was both worried and exhausted. So i hold her to sleep again...I know this is bad to her sleep-training... i just can't help. I wish this time she didn't catch some virus.... keep my fingers crossed.

18 month check up

After a couple of days staying at home, amy can't wait to go back to day care. But this morning i scheduled her 18 month check up at 9:30 am. So i told her that we'd go to check her weight first and then we'll go see avory. Somehow she only picked up the signal about "avory" and tuned out the first part. When we got into the clinic, she had this totally felling betrayed expression on her face. As she ran towards the door, she yelled, AVORY AVORY NO MINE NO MINE! All the nurses thought that's cute. Well... it's always cute when it happens to somebody else!

Weight: 25.3 lb
Height: 35 inch
Head: 19 1/4 inch.

2nd ear infection, NO MINE

Amy's ear infection came back. By far this is already the 3rd kind of antibiotics she's on. Hopefully it'll work this time. :( .

Everytime she gets sick, she figures out some new trick to drive us nuts. She knows we wouldn't really punish her during this kinda time. Kids are so smart! This time the new thing she picked up is 'NO MINE'. Whatever we say, she'd reply by a violently "NO MINE". She doesn't really know what it means. I guess some kids at day care yelled at her by that. She just found it really powerful. So now our daily conversation includes, "amy, you want some milk?" - NO MINE! "amy, you want to go out?" - NO MINE! Her father would tease her by saying, "amy, are you a good girl?" she'd reply by a proudly "NO MINE!". She even says it during her dream, too.

Use a spoon

Ever since amy's in the young toddler room, she's been practicing using spoons. Other kids' ability with this little objective totally intrigues her. At the very beginning, she just insisted on holding a spoon whenever i feed her. She didn't really use it to do anything other than banging it on the table. And then she moved on to poking stuff with the spoon. One day we were sharing yogurt, she found out after dipping the spoon into the cup,there'd be some yogurt on it. She's so excited about this observation that day i have to eat 2 cups of yogurt, all fed by amy. Of course both of us end up dressing most of the yogurt. But it's totally worth it. Recently she can use the spoon to pick up peas and then slowly, clumsly, and adorably put them into her wide opened mouth. It's really hard for her to coordinate the eyes, the mouth, and the hands. So half of the time long before she put the food in front of her mouth, she's already open her mouth really really wide. It's so cute to watch. Of course, she still can't use spoon to take soup. Yesterday, she attempted a couple of time, and the soup all ended up on her clothes.

Too nice

I don't know if there is such a thing as being too nice. Or, is there anything hidden behind being nice? i am thinking feeling insecure might be the real reason for a person to be nice.

I totally don't mind myself being push-over or crowd-pleaser, doing things that i don't want to do just to make others happy. But when it comes to Amy, i always want her to be a free-spirited person, do whatever she herself wants...... Well, most of the time things just don't turn out to be the way you want, do they?! It's just amazing how i can see myself in her, even though she's only 18 months.

Yesterday morning when i dropped amy off at the day care, Vicky was sitting on the floor, blowing bubbles. All the kids were jumping up and down, chasing those bubbles, despite the fact that vicky has told them over and over and over again to sit down. However, the minute vicky said, amy come and sit down, amy sat down quietly, just looking at others playing. If there are bubbles coming her way, she'd try to poke them, if not, she'd just sit there, watching others. After a while, Vicky asked amy to blow the bubble. Again, she did exactly as Vicky instructed the instant she heard her. After that, she returned to her spot, sat down again, quietly.

That's when it hit me, all the things i see in Amy, the friendly smile, the Hi gesture, the hugs she gives out, and the kisses she blows... are all things she tries really hard to do, to please others. By nature, she's a rather shy and quiet kid. But she tries really hard to do what others tell her to do. She's either too nice and sweet or too insecure. I do want to believe it's the former.

As amy gets bigger and bigger, i question myself more and more often. Am i really prepared for this? Yes, i can feed her, change her and bath her, no problem. But when it comes to spiritual/personality/emotional needs and guidance, i really have no clue what to do.

I am trying to convice myself that parenting IS like this. Growing up together is a whole package, including feeling useless, helpless, and panicky.