Wednesday, November 23, 2011

小盆友的科幻

送小盆友上学的路上,等红灯。总共也没等了两分钟,急性子的大小姐就非常之的上火:
“What is wrong with this light?!”
“Oh this is taking FOREVER!"
"OH COME ON!!!!" --- 我有没有这么annoying啊
一个人兀自气了一阵子,脑子里面的电灯泡叮的一声就亮了,开始异想天开
I wish we had a flying car~ That way we don't have to wait anymore!  ---真的假的?!你马迷在连janitors们都人手IPHONE的今天还攥着一上个世纪的产品,就算有飞车,也轮不到咱家开吧。。。
OR! --- 想起樱桃小丸子里面有一集的开头,"我们家很穷~”
I wish everybody else ALL had flying cars~ That way there won't be any cars and lights on the road! ---果然是阿Q马迷生出来的阿Q娃娃啊,你们都进步好了,我们一家子人幸福的固步自封
OR! ---酱紫都不行么。。。你是要怎样?别人送咱家飞车咱们跟着一起在天上堵车乜?!
I wish there's a magic microphone. We tell it where we want to go, and then five seconds later, we are there! --- 这这这这这难道不就是传说中的beam up?!她小小的时候我跟她爸看了很多很多的star trek。。。莫非都被她听去了?!
OR! --- 。。。
I wish there's a magic camera. It takes a picture of us, then we all turn into FAIRIES! You are a big fairy, I am a medium fairy, DD is a teeny tiny little cute fairy. ---我可怜的铁铮铮的男儿汉DD啊~~~

Saturday, November 05, 2011

关于死亡的对话

去年“圣诞老人”应小盆友要求给他们买了两条鱼。



三分钟热度过后,小盆友只有朋友来了会想起来炫耀给人看一下,或者什么筋搭错线突然爱心勃发的趴在鱼缸边假装疯魔 "awwwww you are SO CUTE~"几秒钟。剩下的时间这两条鱼就过着连吃饭都有一搭没一搭的凄惨日子。领导偶尔路过便不由得叹气,你说他们上辈子造了什么孽沦落到咱们家这种冷血家庭来当宠物。。。

大约蓝色的那条上辈子造的孽少一些,他在我家的炼狱鱼生于公元二零一一年十一月四日美国中部时间晚间九点半提前结束了(当然了准确时间没人知道,fish neglect如果是一条罪,那我们全家都是在逃犯)。

马迷顿时很凌乱,倒不是说感叹生命的渺小这种伟大的凌乱,是满脑子就一个念头。。。。
“这可如~何~是~好~~~怎么跟主子们解释啊~~~~~~~~~~~”
万圣节俩人问我马迷ghost是哪里来的我都想晕死过去,现在真的面临死亡了,怎搞怎搞怎搞。
领导很冷静,这还不简单,“开机~放狗!”
其实马迷的浏览器打开就是狗那一页。怎奈何一方面冷血另外一方面ADHD。打开浏览器以后织围脖看电视找人聊天要忙的事情太多。上炕的时候才隐隐觉得好像忘了一件什么事情。老年痴呆自然是想了一夜加一顿早饭也完全没有头绪。

一直到正在嘎嘣嘎嘣嚼万圣节糖豆子的DD挂在我身上突然一声长叹,
"SIGH, I think my fish is dead."
"你你你你。。。你怎么知道的?!”
"I just do."
"SO... how does that make you feel?”
"Nothing...Can I have more candies?"

也许,这本来,就是这么一件很简单很现实的事情?没什么感受好谈?没什么好解释的?
正预备长出一口没必要的多情气之时,胖黛玉姐节画画课回来了。
DD一出溜儿从我身上滑下来,冲过去俩人就展开了严肃的关于死亡的对话
Amy, Guess what, my fish died!"
看dolphin tale给我哭得死去活来的小盆友此时居然萌生了很多做姐节的豪情壮志,慢声细语的安慰道,"Oh,really? that's OK,DD, are you OK? are you sad?"
然后完全不顾DD很冷静很缓慢的回答,"No I am not sad",继续提出了非常先进的therapy常见手段,"It's OK to feel sad, you know what, let's draw a picture for her! That way you'll always remember her!"
俩人摸了纸和笔以后,这位做姐节的脚着人生哲理需要继续跟傻D掰扯清楚,便接着孜孜不倦。
"You know what DD, everybody dies. It's just something that's gonna happen sooner or later. There's nothing you can do about it. I think mommy will die some day too. Even though she says she won't die. But I don't think that's true."
我这一口气差点儿没提上来当场就被她气死之际,但听得DD还很淡定的跟进道,
"Yeah you are right, she'll die too..."